World News Headlines January 20, 2022 Under One Ceiling 0 Build-A-Bear wants to help you get laid 0 0000 0 0 more Build-A-Bear wants to help you get laid January 20, 2022 Under One Ceiling now playing Transferring money from UAE abroad: what are my cheapest options January 20, 2022 Under One Ceiling WIN With Nespresso This Mother’s Day January 20, 2022 Under One Ceiling NBA Playoffs 2022: A Casual Fan's Guide to the Postseason January 20, 2022 Under One Ceiling Best New Climbing Gear of 2022 January 20, 2022 Under One Ceiling A Local Weekend Travel Guide to Austin, Texas January 20, 2022 Under One Ceiling First Drive: 2022 Range Rover Ups the Luxury SUV Experience January 20, 2022 Under One Ceiling Most Stylish Rain Jackets, Parkas, and Trench Coats for Men January 20, 2022 Under One Ceiling EU eyes Russian oil import ban as Moscow strikes western Ukraine January 20, 2022 Under One Ceiling World-class Clark Int’l Airport opens new 110,000 square-meter passenger terminal January 20, 2022 Under One Ceiling PCG: Bodies of 5 children who drowned in Taal Lake found January 20, 2022 Under One Ceiling Build-A-Bear wants to help you get laid We knew those Build-A-Bear people had to be freaks. The mall and children’s birthday party mainstay has launched a new product line with a description that frankly just sounds kind of dirty. “HeartBox” is a series of gift boxes that contain tchotchkes and, duh, a bear, that aren’t meant for Build-A-Bear’s usual customers — which, please God, are usually kids. Instead, Build-A-Bear describes the line as an “adult gifting brand.” Sorry, it can’t just be us. “Adult gifting” makes it sound like Build-A-Bear is launching a weird line of bear-themed sex products, right? RIGHT? We know, we know, it’s probably only differentiating that these boxes are for “adults” because, again, those usual customers are (HOPEFULLY) children. But c’mon, they gotta know what “adult entertainment” means! When you’re in the business of making bears (and not, ya know, bears), it’s on you to watch the innuendo, Build-A-Bear. HeartBoxes are launching with four different themed boxes. And indeed, one of them is the “Romantic at Heart” box, with marketing copy that invites you to “Set the Mood.” Hello Build-A-Bear! Maybe all that wink adult gifting wink wasn’t in our heads. The box comes with “well-coordinated items such as gummy bears, tumblers, and candles.” Throw a plush bear in there and hot damn do you have the makings of a night to remember. Build-A-Bear actually already has a bunch of bears meant for adults that live on a portion of the company’s website called The Bear Cave. You have to acknowledge that you’re 18 or older to enter the site, which really got me excited that I was maybe gonna see some like, bears with dicks. The fact that this bear cave has a digital red velvet curtain? Promising. Credit: Screenshot: Build-A-Bear Alas, the Bear Cave seems to be where collectible-level bears live, which is why they’re for grown ups, duh. But don’t worry! There are also sassy bears seemingly made for exhausted moms (there are sloths wearing t-shirts that say “nap queen”), or for partners in the dog house/bear cave who want to deliver the message of “I’m Sorry” on the t-shirt of a toy. Other bears in the Bear Cave are, in fact, ready to have a good-ass time, though. Some come bearing bottles of bubbly and wine, and one of them is just… Satan. Am I into bears now?? Bears: They’re here to party. Credit: Screenshot: Build-A-Bear Mr. Bear, have I been bad? Credit: Build-A-Bear If one thing is clear, it’s that these bears fuck. And maybe, with their help, you can too. Related Related posts: Global coronavirus cases exceed 11 million: Live updates Covid-19 has exposed the limits of ‘fact-denying populism’, Merkel tells European Parliament tags: RSS Feed World News 0000 0 0 previous Opera’s new ‘crypto browser’ makes wasting money on NFTs surprisingly easy next BeReal is what 'casual Instagram' wants to be
